|Christine Chapel: Set Phaser to Stunning!|
Chapel actually gave up a career in bio research to join the crew of a star ship. And she joined the crew of a star ship on the off chance that it would one day pass by Exo III and she could swoop in and find Roger Korby, her long lost fiance, on her own. How romantic! That poor doll is in for a terrible surprise as I'm sure Korby is long dead.
Everyone knows who Dr. Robert Korby is. He single-handedly threw lab assistant after lab assistant under the bus to climb to the top of the field of immunology as we know it today. He's the reason why we all don't die from the Andorian airborn clap or space-madness delirium flu. (Unfortuantely the success of his methods has made many individuals, such as my dear departed Joe Tormolen (see post: The Naked Time) oblivious to space contagion.)
|My Marcus Matthews|
|Bizarre Love Triangle|
Turns out that Marcus and Rayburn have just been called down to the surface after all. Surely, nothing could go wrong.
|Goodbye Marcus Matthews|
I needed to take my mind off of my own sorrowful life so I sat Christine down in that salon chair and I said. "Christine Chapel, we are going to have a grief-fueled beautification session and you are going to tell me everything that happened." I just wouldn't take no for an answer. And here's what she told me...
|Cross Your Abs Bra|
I composed myself and she was saying something about Korby living underground all this time with some auburn haired floozy named Andrea. I insisted she tell me how this Andrea looked. What was she wearing? Well, she said she was wearing some kind of crazy blue and green cross your heart suspendered jumpsuit with no blouse. It sounded fabulous in spite of my breaking heart. I didn't ask Christine more about Andrea as she had turned green with jealousy.
She said about that time Korby came in and they kissed. She started weeping again saying she should have known then. She just kept saying she should have known. It seems Korby wouldn't let them contact the ship. Then I got a little lost. Browny, whoever the hell he was, got shot and he turned out to be some kind of robot. Then this giant named Ruk came in and he was wearing this padded grey cloak with a popped collar and a gorgeous pink floral blouse. Then, Andrea took Christine away and I just couldn't follow anything she said at this point she was crying so hard. I did get that Andrea was an android and possibly some kind of pleasure bot.
|Naked Spinning Kirks|
|Kirk and His Rock|
Christine paused and blew her nose. She started back with her story, and I kept asking questions, but I was just on auto pilot. I have no idea what she said. I just continued working on her hair and started right into her makeup. I guess I did overdo it just a bit. Long story short, everybody got killed except Christine and Kirk and they made it back to the ship. And yes, Roger was a robot in some tawdry robot sex triangle with Ruk and Andrea. I still don't know who Browny was or why the caves were just littered with penis-shaped rock formations. Anyhoo, by the end of that story I had over made that make over, dialed it right up to a full eleven! Well, the only thing left for me to do was escort Chapel down to sick bay, where it was grief meds all around!
|Christine Chapel after Her Grief-Fueled Makeover|